Thanks to all for being here :) This week we continue our series on the family, this time focussing on the role of the husband and father. I'll try to avoid some overlap with last week's study dealing with wives/mothers, but the concepts do lend to each other, even as the man and his wife are to become "one flesh."

So first we'll start with the blessings of fatherhood, and then move on from there :)

As this is a Bible study that focusses on Creation, let's go back to Genesis to see what I consider one of the most remarkable testimonies to the benefits of being a father. "And Enoch lived sixty and five years, and begat Methuselah: And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters: And all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty and five years: And Enoch walked with God: and he was not; for God took him." (Gen 5:21-24)

You know, Enoch is a very important figure in the Bible. He's one of three individuals who are mentioned as not dying, the other two being Elijah and Melchizedek who: "Without father, without mother, without descent, having neither beginning of days, nor end of life; but made like unto the Son of God; abideth a priest continually." (Heb 7:3)

Some believe Melchizedek to be Christ in a pre-incarnate form, and if that is the case the Enoch is in even more exclusive company. Nevertheless, look at the passage again, specifically verse 22: "And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters." (Gen 5:22)

So much for the people who teach it's more "holy" to remain single :) Now, it may be as Paul said that if someone feels led to do this, they will surely have more time to dedicate to the things that please God, but this has nothing to do with how much one is _actually_ able to please Him: "By faith Enoch was translated that he should not see death; and was not found, because God had translated him: for before his translation he had this testimony, that he pleased God." (Heb 11:5)

So Enoch was a father, and moreover, as verse 22 says "after" he begat Methuselah he walked with God. That verse seems to be saying that after he became a father, after he held his infant son for the first time, Enoch really began to understand his role as a child of God. Perhaps he learned this lesson fully at that time: "Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?" (Heb 12:9)

If we understand our role as children of earthly fathers, it makes it easier for us to see our role as children of the "Father of spirits." Enoch understood his role as a child of God because he was himself a father, and for the faith that resulted from this understanding (among other things), he was able to pass into Heaven without seeing death.

What are the other blessings of fatherhood? We come full circle to our first study: "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." (Pro 22:6)

A joy of fatherhood is seeing your children succeed in life. After all, we certainly want to avoid the following verse being said of us :) "He that begetteth a fool doeth it to his sorrow: and the father of a fool hath no joy." (Pro 17:21) But rather: "A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish man despiseth his mother." (Pro 15:20)

Well, the first part, anyway...

The New Testament offers still more advice as to how to bring this about: "Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged." (Col 3:21)

To go back to the same analogy, has the Father in Heaven ever provoked His people to anger? Yet, they surely have with Him many times! Yet as a true and good Father, He shows real love, being kind, patient, seeking our best interest and so on.

In the same way, we are not to judge always how good a father is by how his children turn out. This, I think, is one of the "easy answers" society has come up with - to blame the parents. Of course, there is some responsibility on those who are responsible for the person's training - but what if we judged the Most High by the actions of His children?

Adam, the firstborn man, and the one who saw the Elohim complete the creation, he had a son who didn't turn out quite so well: "And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him." (Gen 4:8)

The prophet Samuel, who was a wonderful priest, and speaker, and judge, had sons that didn't turn out so well: "Then all the elders of Israel gathered themselves together, and came to Samuel unto Ramah, and said unto him, Behold, thou art old, and thy sons walk not in thy ways: now make us a king to judge us like all the nations." (1 Sam 8:4-5)

Aaron, the first high priest, had four sons. Of two of them, we know this: they offered unsanctified sacrifices before the Temple, "And there went out fire from the Lord, and devoured them, and they died before the Lord." (Lev 10:2)

Even with the best parenting, children are people, and they are free moral agents. Therefore it is written: "The fathers shall not be put to death for the children, neither shall the children be put to death for the fathers: every man shall be put to death for his own sin." (Deu 24:16)

There is a verse that seems to contradict this, and maybe we should mention it here. The Word, of course, does not speak against Itself, and my experience has always been that if we simply examine context and wording, we find the Bible is a unified whole in spirit and message. The verse says God is: "Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children's children, unto the third and to the fourth generation." (Exo 34:7)

The same sentiment is also echoed in Numbers 14:18. In both cases, however, the word used is "visiting." It doesn't say the sins are attributed to the offspring. In the same way Adam sinned, but Cain and Abel were not guilty of it in the same way that he was. Now, they did have to bear the _consequences_ of it, for as Paul says later: "For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive." (1 Cor 15:22)

Cain and Abel both inherited the sin nature, and we have all had to deal with that as human beings ever since. This is what that verse means. The word "visiting" is the Hebrew "paquad," and it means to be looked upon. It is also translated as "numbered." You know that Christ was "numbered with the transgressors," as it says in Isaiah, while He Himself was not a transgressor. The word is a little different in the Isaiah verse, but the meaning is basically the same. Children often suffer the consequences of their parents' decisions, but they are at the same time responsible for their own choices.

It is therefore not always fitting to blame the parents whenever something goes wrong in an individual's life, or to say he had a "genetic disposition to drink." Even if there are things that make it more likely for a person to be drawn to certain ill-advised practices (either by birth or environment), how did Paul deal with situations like that? Well, he talked to God. "And He said unto me, 'My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.'" (2 Cor 12:9)

He gloried in these things. The Greek word is "astheneia," which means "native weaknesses." Paul is not here saying these are temptations he gave into, but things he knew he was more drawn to using as excuses, whatever the "thorn in the flesh" he was speaking of in verse 7 was. In any case, the word of the Father is, "My grace is sufficient for thee."

The role of the father, therefore, in a family is to encourage his children, as it says... not provoke them to anger, lest they be discouraged. He is to build them up in faith, being for them a priest even as Noah was a priest unto the salvation of his family - we looked at this last week. "But Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord." (Gen 6:8)

"And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons' wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood." (Gen 7:7)

Because of the faith of one man, the husband and father, all the family was saved. So it is to be (ideally) with the fathers of all families. They are to be over their children spiritually, to lead them also to develop their own good characteristics, and point out in love the negative traits which they should put away.

Speaking of which, in the _Heavenly_ Father, two roles are linked - that of both Father and Husband. He is Father to us as individuals, and Husband to us as a Church; as a whole. When He speaks to us one-on-one, it is as a Father: "After this manner therefore pray ye: 'Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.'" (Mat 6:9)

When He deals with us collectively, it is as a Husband to a Bride: "For I am jealous over you with godly jealousy: for I have espoused you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ." ((2 Cor 11:2)

To be honest, I just noticed that distinction as I was writing the notes for this study today, and I'm still not sure of all of its significance. If any of you have thoughts on this, please do share them.

So what is to be said of earthly husbands? What is to be their role? We looked last week at the husband/wife relationship from the wife's perspective, and we saw that the two are truly one in Christ, truly equals: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus." (Gal 3:28)

And yet there was a difference in the role: "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body." (Eph 5:23)

So what does that mean, to be the "head" of the wife, and therefore the family? As simplistic as it sounds, we can get part of the answer from the word itself. The word "husband" comes from old Norse, "husbondi," and literally means a house-bond. One who binds, or keeps the house together. As we saw, one of the manifestations of that is a priest, but there are more personal considerations as well. Hear what the Word says: "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it." (Eph 5:25)

I've heard it asked, how can God command love? Well, He did :) In fact, when they asked Christ which the greatest commandment was, He gave two answers, and both commanded love. "Jesus said unto him, 'Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.'" (Mat 22:37-39)

The love here is more than just the emotional response. It's a dedication to a person, a commitment to doing good for them, as it says of a good wife who loves her husband: "She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life." (Pro 31:12)

So it is also with husbands. Paul is telling husbands to do good to their wives. Not that love doesn't have an emotional component, of course! "Thou hast ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; thou hast ravished my heart with one of thine eyes, with one chain of thy neck. How fair is thy love, my sister, my spouse! how much better is thy love than wine! and the smell of thine ointments than all spices!" (Song 4:9-10)

That is one of it's truly great blessings, to be able to feel that about your spouse :) But it is only a true blessing if it comes along with the mental and spiritual commitment also. "Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame." (Song 8:6)

The bond that love creates should be stronger than just an emotional high. It is a "seal," as sure as death, jealousy, and the grave. It is a fire that "cannot be quenched," as verse 7 goes on to say. That's not speaking of just emotoins, which can and do die away, if they are left to themselves. But the emotions that spring forth from true love are everlasting.

As we saw in the case of Enoch, how well one does as a father and husband is directly connected to how much of an effective servant we can be to our own Father. Here is a passage from 1 Timothy we might discuss. It's a few lines, so let me know when you're done reading :)

"This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) " (1 Tim 3:1-5)

Several things worthy of note there. First, a bishop (the word just means elder, really) must have a good reputation... but right after that Paul starts talking about family relationships. He must have one wife (at the most). It doesn't mean single guys can't be elders, but they sure can't be bigamists! And of course they should be sober, vigilant, kind to others... able to teach. That last one is really important to the outward activities of an elder of course. Then he goes back to family ties: "One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity." (1 Tim 3:4)

So here we see both issues mentioned. The role of both the husband and the father are important for a man, not only in the things of this world, but also spiritual things. As Paul ends the topic, he gives his reasons for saying all that: "(For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)" (1 Tim 3:5)

That is the point of it right there. If a man is not a good "house-band," he can't be a good "keeper" or bond for the church. Even for the (seemingly) lesser office of deacon: "Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well." (1 Tim 3:12) We see the exact same criteria.

As it is written: "And he said unto him, 'Well, thou good servant: because thou hast been faithful in a very little, have thou authority over ten cities.'" (Luke 19:17)

When we are faithful in the small things, and we are proven, He can give us greater responsibility. As 1 Timothy goes on to say, he is not to be a "novice" in the faith either, not to be untried. Not that families are small things, but they are good training for being over a flock.

By doing this, by setting a good example in faith, all your family may be saved a "flood" of trouble, because as Paul says when speaking of the role of the husband in marriage: "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church." (Eph 5:31-32)

How men feel about their wives (ideally) is the way Christ feels about his church. So again, just as Enoch learned the role of being a child from his experience with his son, so husbands can learn the role of being a part of the "Bride of Christ" by learning how to be a husband to their own wives. As they do this, as they grow in this understanding, they start to care for the family of God as their own, and then they are equipped to enter into the service as a leader of the people.

And of course, we do not need to restrict it to elders or deacons either. As Peter says: "But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of Him who hath called you out of darkness into His marvellous light." (1 Pet 2:9)

We are all priests, who know the Lord. We are all charged with the great comission: "And He said unto them, 'Go ye into all the world, and preach the Gospel to every creature.'" (Mark 16:15)

This should always be our aim. This should always be the focus of our lives, that all we do, and say, and all that we show other people of our lives should be bringing them nearer to the Kingdom of Heaven. This is true whether we are children, mothers, brothers, sisters, friends, fathers or husbands.

David.